How do I know what I want when I always know what I ought to want?

John’s talk from the sex lectures series held in Manchester.

Introducing the Wheel of Consent


The Wheel Of Consent, through touch based exercises, both alone and with partners, gives you an experience of 4 ways to touch and relate, within a conception of consent which is clear, enthusiastic and in the moment.

These 4 ways are:

Taking for your own pleasure – you do what you want – while respecting the giver’s boundaries

Allowing another to take from you – they do what they want- with your permission – while maintaining your boundaries

Serving another for their pleasure – you do what they want – within your boundaries

Accepting the gift of another’s service – they do what you want – while maintaining their boundaries.


The work is excellent for:

Waking up sensuality – feeling and following pleasure

Making choices – learning how to choose for yourself

Understanding the dynamics of giving and receiving

Gaining skills of empowerment and communication – having the courage to ask for what you want, and feeling safe enough to receive

Please note that the work focuses on intention, conscious choice and autonomy.  Participants will remain clothed and there is no sexual touch.

Wheel of Consent Workshop

The workshop will take place on Saturday 16 March 2019, 2-6pm at

Yoga Healing
Studio 7
22 Mansfield Street,
G11 5QP

Cost £25.

The workshop will be facilitated by John Fraser.  John is a sex coach and zen teacher.  He has worked extensively with Betty Martin, the originator of The Wheel.  For more information about him see:

For more information about the workshop, and to book, please contact John at:   07545 707751

Every Body Loves, Hummingbird and Flower

We are delighted to offer this wonderful Feminine Embodiment Women’s Workshop Saturday 13 October with Kay Balavanes.

About Kay

Kay is an Embodiment Mentor and teacher of the Feminine Arts based in Bali who works with women in Asia, Australia & Europe. She applies her trainings & initiations in Yoga Therapeutics, 5 Element Meridian Wisdom of Chinese Medicine, Taoist & Tibetan Healing Energetics & Bodywork, Womb Awakening and Embodied Mindfulness in her classes, workshops and retreats.

Workshop Intentions

This will be an experiential movement class for our female anatomy to address the impact of modern life
The aim is to gently unravel some of the stress we are all carrying.

We will explore embodiment practices to move beyond the barriers to being fully in our bodies as women
This may include breath work, Shakti banda and womb receptivity cultivation practice.

What this means in reality is starting with the denser feelings in your body and moving to subtler layers of feeling as we journey into the womb.

1. This will be a fully clothed, gentle session of focus on our body’s as women led by a experienced practitioner in bodywork and movement for women from eastern traditions
2. We will be an intimate group of 8 women participants so we can benefit from sharing and being supported in our sisterhood
3. If you already have a deep practice there is no need to amend your practice, This can be a stand alone experience for your body
4. If you do not have any practices you may learn a few processes that you chose to continue in your life if you find them beneficial

Kay  is passionate about practices tailored to the female form to awaken the potent & intelligent energy centres of the body.  Her teachings merge eastern and western wisdom teachings, with modern science & and psychology to educate, empower & inspire every woman to deepen intimacy with herself & her life.

Workshop Details

The workshop will be in Hyndland Glasgow on Saturday October 13  from 14.00- 19.00 and costs £50.  If you are interested and would like more information or to reserve your place please contact Karen for more information.

The Women’s Sexuality Group Dates 2018 for the Glasgow Meetup Group are now available for the whole year.  We meet every four weeks between 18.00-20.00 on Wednesdays in Hyndland in the West End of Glasgow.  The schedule is:

24 January

21 February

21 March

16 May

13 June

11 July

8 August

5 September

3 October

31 October

28 November

We are enthusiastic about making this a very lively meeting that is all about inquiry.  We  share our interests and our experiences.  We also create new learning through our inquiry into women’s sexuality for ourselves and in general.  We are always interested in experimenting with the best way to facilitate great conversations. So this year we are starting the year with introducing John as a co-facilitator for our group.  John brings a wealth of different training and coaching style to working with women’s sexuality.  He can also give us a male perspective which can be very helpful in exploring the issues that arise.


This doesn’t mean we can’t have a woman only space.  We usually agree the subject of the next meeting at the end of the session.  If a subject comes up where we want to just share as women, we can set that up whenever we want.  The idea is to have as much flexibility as possible and create somewhere that brings in a wide range of new ideas.


You may have more questions about how this forum works or how we create intimacy and safety.  If you want to know more please contact Karen through our contact form with your questions.  If you provide a phone number and she will be very happy to arrange a time to chat to find out more about what matters to you and how we can make the group most welcoming for you.


To book a place in the group you just need to let us know that you are coming.  The cost is £15  and then you receive all the details for you to join us.  The group will never be more than 12 members at any one session so that we can feel cosy with one another.



It’s that time of year again when some of us will be delighted and some others of us will be horrified by the ‘Spirit of Xmas’.  Whatever your approach is to the festive season, there is a different wee addition to the usual fare is you are a woman who is interested in exploring your sexuality with a group of like-minded women.


The Women’s Sexuality Meet Up Group in Glasgow is a two hour discussion group where we can relax as new friends and share our views and experiences, our hopes and dreams and fears in a confidential and warm environment.  We can seek advice from each other, offer our opinions about life and share a good laugh about all the weird and wonderful aspects of sexual expression that we have to come to know in our experience so far.  And we can also bring up things we are wondering about exploring in the future.

We are women  who are different ages with different levels of experience so we try to bring in a range of aspects to the conversations.  We can look at what the words we are using mean to each of us.  We can share how the people around us in our lives may respond to the subject.  We can talk about what these experiences feel like in our bodies and our emotional responses.  We can laugh at the surprises that turn up along the way.  And we can share some of the pain of disappointment that we all feel from time to time when life is bringing us the experiences we had hoped for.

Xmas Women’s Sexuality Meetup Group Glasgow – Save The Date


We aim to cover a different theme each time and usually to set this in advance.  However at the Xmas meeting we will decide what is important for us on the day.  This will be on Wednesday 20 December between 18.00 and 20.00 in the West End of Glasgow.  You can book your place by contacting us and paying the £15 in advance.  See you there.

Talking about sex sounds easy to many of us.  Some of us can’t shut up about it!  So it was interesting for John and I when we ran a workshop on Pleasure for the national Sexpression conference at Edinburgh University recently.  Young, mostly medical students are running a fantastic sex education programme for 16 years around the country.  It is more comprehensive than anything I could have imagined when I was young.


How much I would have welcomed knowing then so much that I learnt the hard way through trial and error in my romantic relationships.  Not having a brother, the male body was a strange and unknown landscape and I worked my away around it without a map.  Burt more importantly my own body was a wonder and a surprise as I discovered what I did and did not like myself.


I learnt along the way that pleasure is about the senses and my willingness to be in my body.  And once in my body pleasure is about how much I am willing to feel not just joy but all my feelings, to be intimate with myself and to let other people be intimate with me when I choose.


So how does this relate to talking about Sex?  In our first Women’s Sexuality Meetup Group in Glasgow we dived into conversation about what interested us.  And what we quickly noticed was that every term we used meant something different to each of us.  Simple words like sex and sensuality and pleasure were not really a common language.  Instead our cultures, our life experiences, our age and our social context all meant that there was a rich sharing of what matters to each of us that could enlarge our understanding of what can really be meant when we talk to another person.


We agreed some simple rules for our future discussions

  • We don’t need to have the same views but the inquiry is really valuable
  • The value of sharing what happens in our bodies when we have experiences. We don’t want to be disassociated from our bodies and so need pay attention to how the subjects we are discussing really feel like within us
  • To reflect on our experience of ourselves and our personal peer groups. We come from different backgrounds so we see and can share the ways different groups understand and act on sexuality in their lives
  • To focus on one main topic for each meeting.

Future Topics

1. What is sexual attraction and flirtation
2. What is sex
3. Tantric Goddess session
4. Relationships and sexuality (not the same thing)
5. Desire and wanting
6. What Feminine and Masculine mean and the impact of these words
7. Beauty

And the topic for the next meeting is PLEASURE

If you are a woman who can make it to the West End of Glasgow for 6 p.m. on Wednesdays we will be meeting every four weeks.  The next meeting is 15 November and the cost is £15  Please contact us to book a place.


It is a real pleasure for me to see how the community of women who are interested in exploring sexuality and intimacy is growing in Glasgow and Edinburgh.  Our August women’s sexuality weekend workshops, “Reconnecting to feminine wisdom for health and wholeness” and “My Body My Self” with Pauline Mc Cluskey brought together a great group of women who dived straight in to the exploration with honesty, vulnerability and strength.


It felt a heart warming to come together with old friends and make new ones.  The workshops gave us the opportunity to  connect with the glories and challenges of living  in our women’s bodies and learn from our different ways of being feminine.  It inspired me to set up a regular meeting for women to support and learn with each other about the different paths of pleasure and find more freedom in self-expression.  So the Women’s Sexuality Meet Up group Glasgow was born!


Conscious sexuality and body confidence give us a fantastic springboard for tapping into our creativity and living life with more passion. As women, most of us are less confident than we could be in this area and so we can limit our enjoyment in life and underestimate our positive impact on others.


For the first introductory meeting we will be holding an informal and fun session to identify what would really make our group a stimulating, expansive and place to be. We will be setting the agenda for the types of subjects we will be exploring together over the next few months. We will be agreeing how to ensure that we feel safe, supported and also challenged to express our sexuality as women in a way that is fully authentic for each one of us.


The  Women’s Sexuality Meetup Group Glasgow will meet in Hyndland (West End) and there are only 10 places available. The date is Wednesday 18 October between 18.00- 20.00. We will agree our schedule at this meeting.  The cost is £15.


In addition, John and I will be running a workshop for students on the lovely subject of ‘Pleasure’ for the Sexpression National Conference at Edinburgh University on Sunday 4 November 2017.  I am looking forward to bringing some of the wisdom we have been sharing in our women only forums to introduce to young women and men at the start of their adult lives.  The more we can pass on our hard won learning, the more joy will be spread in the world and that feels like a great move in the right direction to me.


EBL Hummingbird Events

More details about our two brilliant women’s sexuality workshops with Pauline McCluskey in August.

Reconnecting to feminine wisdom for health and wholeness

Saturday Workshop 13.30 – 19.00

For women who want to reconnect to their innate wisdom and capacity for health and wellbeing.

Childbirth, miscarriage, menopause or problems in the pelvic bowl, combined with the stresses and strains of busy lives, can disrupt our natural creativity and flow as women. This workshop is an opportunity to come back to ourselves, to reconnect with our wholeness, at every age.

Using a combination of meditation, movement and simple, fun Group and partner exercises in our women’s circle, we will explore what holds us back and what limits our connection to our creative feminine energy.


We’ll re-acquaint ourselves with our bodies and our sexiness in a supportive, nurturing space.


My Body My Self

Sunday Workshop 10.30 – 17.00


Will offer some new perspectives on consent, autonomy, body confidence and comfort in our female selves. As women, we are bombarded with messages about how we should look, what we should wear, how we should behave. We’ll give these perceptions and expectations a good shakedown, let go of some of the things that hold us back, and reconnect with our unique, self assured, beautiful and fabulous selves.


Both events will combine fun exercises and conversations to connect us to ourselves in new, thoughtful and experiential ways, with an emphasis on supporting each other as women.


Pauline Mc Cluskey


They will be led by Pauline McCluskey, assisted by Karen. Pauline is a sex, intimacy and relationship coach with a special interest in supporting women to find their natural capacity for aliveness, confidence and creativity. She draws on many years experience as a nurse, facilitator and teacher, and on her training in Tantra and Women’s Pelvic Health Care to support women in groups, in relationships and one to one.




Each day is a stand alone at a cost of £65, or you can attend both days for £110.

Places are limited to 15 for each day and booking is essential. For more details and to book, email

Venue is Yoga Healing in Mansfield Street in the heart of Glasgow’s West End, ideally located for transport links to Edinburgh and other cities


EBL Hummingbird Events

Tantra teaches us that sex is sacred and that our aliveness as sexual beings is the dynamo that heals the barriers between sex, heart and spirit.


Tantric practices open us up to a greater capacity to experience pleasure in all things. They free us to expand emotionally and spiritually. This introductory event is practical and experiential. It introduces techniques that can be applied immediately in everyday life, to enrich our inner lives, our creativity and our relationships.


We are hosting another introductory workshop led by our colleague Annabel and will be supporting her through the day.  She is tremendous fun to work with and we are happy that she has agreed to join us again following on from the success of the last  workshop earlier in the year.


It will be a safe, playful day to expand our awareness of pleasure and exploring how we negotiate meeting the other. It is a fully clothed. This event is hosted by Every Body Loves, Glasgow. It will be taught by Annabel Newfield, a senior teacher of Shakti Tantra.  More details about this well established tantra school can be viewed at


June Introductory Tantra Day Details


Saturday 10 JUNE 2017 13.00-19.00

Cost £65. Booking is essential. To book and for more information call, text or email John on 07545 707751

Venue: Body Sense, 22 Mansfield Street, Glasgow G11 5QP (next to Kelvinhall underground and 8 minutes walk from Partick station).

Please bring a snack to share in the break.  We look forward to seeing you there.

Thank you for everyone who came to our Introductory Tantra Day in Glasgow on 4 February.  It was a great success and we even had a waiting list!  Thank you so much to the brilliant Annabel Newfield for being such a star.


We’re now planning future events.  These will be twofold: teachers we invite to Glasgow (and maybe Edinburgh too, we are looking into the possibilities for working there), and work that Karen and I do, both separately and together.


Regarding the former, preparations are in an advanced stage to bring Ali Grace to Glasgow to teach more about The Wheel Of Consent. This is a simple but brilliant method invented by Dr Betty Martin. Which picks apart our normal ideas of erotic giving and taking. It revolutionizes people’s attitudes towards erotic pleasure. You can find out more about Ali at, and more about Betty’s work at


Later in the year, we plan to bring another experienced practitioner and teacher, Pauline McCluskey, to Glasgow. More details to follow. You can find out more about Pauline’s work at


We very much enjoy sharing our work through both informal and formal talks.  We are available for interested groups in Glasgow and Edinburgh.  If you, or anyone you can think of, would like to hear about how we support intimacy and sexual expression, we will be pleased to arrange any special interest talks or to address any existing groups or teams.  Do feel free to get in touch with us to discuss options.


With regard to Karen and I, apart from continuing to offer individual sessions, we are keen to find out where there might be the most interest. I can obviously teach tantric massage and Karen energetic touch, to singles and to couples, but we’d be really keen to know what aspect of sexuality interests you most, so we can gauge what to offer. If you could privately email me about this at, or use the message facility on our website, that would be really appreciated and, obviously, would be completely confidential.