The Blocks To Starting Work With A Sexuality Practitioner
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Seeking support and guidance for sexuality issues is a big deal. It requires bravery to take the first step.
.In my experience, the maximum points of obstruction don’t occur once the work has actually started, they tend to occur earlier
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The first and most obvious stage is just contacting me at all. I try to help that by being as clear and comprehensive as I can be on my website, on social media and so on, about my approach and about the perspective that I bring to working with sexuality. I’m attempting to be completely transparent about who I am, where I’m coming from, and how I work, so in your research about which practitioners to work with, you can make an informed choice.
The second point of difficulty is that people who have managed to marshal up the courage to send me a text or email me, when I contact them, nothing happens. They don’t respond. That’s not because they’ve lost interest or are pulling my leg in some way.It’s just that it’s too much. [sometimes my response goes into the Junk folder; always worth checking]
And often what conspires to make it ‘too much’ is a kind of fantasy idea about what a session might look like. So to try to get around that, what I offer is to just come and see me [or Zoom or call] and simply have a non chargeable open conversation with me to just get a sense of what it’s like interacting with me, being at my place of practice, and so on.
The third point of obstruction is a curious one. It’s when you’ve contacted me, we’ve had our initial conversation, and it just stops at that point.
Now, it might stop for a very legitimate reason.It might be because I’m not the practitioner for you, [and if so I’m always very happy to refer you to somebody else], but much more often it’s the disjunct between your ordinary life and what the idea of working with me entails.
We can have a conversation, we can talk about your issues and how we might resolve those issues, but somehow it’s as if that’s all on some sort of island,so when you go back into the real world, it’s like it’s just been a dream.
To try and deal with that obstruction, which in a way is the most pernicious one, what I do, at your option, once I have a conversation with you, is that I outline [by email] my understanding of what where you are, where you want to get to, and how we’re going to get there.So there’s something tangible that can act as a bridge between actually working with me and your world as at present,
A bridge between how you are now and how you want to be.
Fear doesn’t require you to say “I’m never going to do this”. It only needs you to say “Not today”. But if not now, when?
[ If you’re interested in exploring the possibility of working with me, just email me at johnwebberfraser@gmail.com or text me on 07545707751 and we’ll get something in the diary]
